Resolving in November

So we reach the end of November with St Andrews Day.  Despite some of my favourite people in the world having been born in November it has never been a favourite month of mine.  I find it too grey, too long and though it’s officially still Autumn for me its the first month of winter.  Winter has its merits and I try to embrace the bits I like but its my least favourite season by a long way.  I am a child of the light and struggle with the ever-increasing dark morning and nights.

In saying all that 2013 has taught me that our time in this world is short, time moves fast your babies quickly become your toddlers, your primary children your secondary child.  You don’t know what life is going to throw at you next.  So you think what is your point?  My point is when I was young I dreaded the winter months bar Christmas.   These days I know you still need to find joy in each and every day and spend it with the people who make you smile in life.  Which is why last month I was debating about the merits of resolving and all my 2013 resolves.

But my conclusion was ” I have started so I will finish.” and actually the resolves have focused me this year and I can hand on heart say I have made progress in each and everyone.  So what of November?

Well it was a really busy month and I have packed lots into it.  It started with a trip to London to see the tennis at the 02.  This was such a great weekend and a huge adventure for me.  In a past life I was up and down to London and to cities overseas on a fairly regular basis and didn’t think anything of it.  These days I spend 99% of my life in the Scottish Borders and even going to Edinburgh or Glasgow is an adventure.  And big cities like London have started to daunt me.   I wasn’t sure I would cope with all these people and with the transport.  Could this wee country bumpkin cope with the big city?  I had booked the tennis ticket in a spontaneous moment in February.   My sister-in-law who has asked me before kindly asked me again and I thought Yes.  Months later with money tight I thought maybe No.  Though admitted to a friend this was partly because I was scared to go and face the city.  This I knew was wrong and when a little windfall work wise came through it was the sign I needed to go and embrace the city.  I am so glad that I did the tennis was fantastic so exciting to be there and really enjoyed the short special time with my sister-in-law and her mum.  The rest of the time was spent with my husband enjoying London.  I had forgotten what a buzz the city can give you and how its great to try new food and get acquainted with new places.  Although I was I confess glad to get home I did resolve not to make it so long next time.

The rest of the month went by really quickly every weekend packed full and work is also full on just now.  So fitting resolves in wasn’t easy.  Good news kept to last years resolutions of writing down all the books I had read and writing down my grateful thing of the day.  Had 95% a cash month which I have now been doing for a couple of months.  I even managed to take my daughter shopping with money I had saved.  That might almost be a first.  Despite dinning out in style in London and on said Edinburgh shopping trip and attending the prestigious Scottish Thistle Awards at Stirling Castle I have ended the month at the same weight as I started with a new version of the diet.   I have done 6:1 as well as 5:2 and it seems to be working.

I have been disappointed with two areas.   It’s been a slow month of reading which has taught me that I need to have a book on the go to keep me me.  Sounds daft but this week I have hardly had a chance to read a page.  It’s been a stressful week and I feel I have let that stress get to me.  I have asked why?  I know some of the why’s and they are out with my control but equally I have realised that I need to take time to read as it helps me forget what is stressing me.  I realise its not the same for everyone but for me reading is not just something that I love it grounds me too.

It’s also been a slow couple of months for exploring my writing.  I resolved last blog that I would make sure I wrote more blog articles in November.  November has come and gone and I have managed a post on the 1st and the 29th.  I have ideas in my head but that is all they are ideas floating in my grey cells.  More than that I haven’t done any creative writing for months and that saddens me as it was something I was so enjoying at the beginning of the year.  Like going to London it was a challenge for me to get started but once started I wanted to keep going with it.  Due to illness my creative writing course hasn’t been running so that is my main excuse.  The other is that since summer I have spent lots of time writing at work with Marketing Plans keeping me busy.  However I miss it.  It niggles away at me.  I dream of escaping back to Harris to write.  I dream of writing and I need to make time to do it.  But when?  The other part of my brain says.  You work full time.  Work is very busy and out with work you have two kids who need your time and these days my taxi skills as I ferry them around.  Not easily resolved but one that I want to otherwise the memory of actually being able to put a story together and the thrill it gave me will fade and will that make me a little less bright?


About fionadranesblog

40 plus mum of two married with a mad cocker spaniel. Along with two colleagues run Bright Light Marketing a rural marketing agency who specialise in getting rural businesss noticed. Live in St Boswells in the wonderful Scottish Borders. Love books, walking and living life to the full here in the Scottish Borders though its sometimes a juggle!
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