What would Fiona Ross say?

Feedback from my last blog from a Facebook friend was that she enjoyed the read but thought that I was too hard on myself. I smiled when I read her comment as she is so right and knew that my parents would agree with her 100%. I have been hard on myself all my life since I was a wee girl and known as Fiona Ross not Fiona Drane.

My poor parents used to despair I would work really hard at school exceed at something such as history but not take the credit for that no I would be too busy bashing myself about what I hadn’t done so well at. This continued all the way through my school years o’grades couldn’t say to myself well done for getting A’s in all the Art subjects I was good at too busy beating myself up that I had failed maths. Highers again didn’t give myself any credit for getting into University something I had wanted to do for along time to follow my dad and be the second family member to go to University. No I was too busy beating myself up that I hadn’t been able to get the grades for law and could only do History and Politics instead. Laughable now as my attention to detail is something I always have to work at and my husband who I met at Uni is a lawyer and his course compared to mine seemed boring and intense in the extreme.

Did it finish there? No it didn’t I beat myself up that I didn’t get a first or a 2:1. As my parents stood proud of me on graduation day I sat giving myself a hard time.

Then by dint of a miracle in the form of a friend who became our best man who suggested I apply for a job at the Scottish Tourist Board I found tourism and marketing. I discovered that I loved both and what’s more I was good at it. Did this stop myself giving myself a hard time?

Well yes and no. Yes in that having been told by one boss that I was clever and doing a good job I started to realise that I had skills and had found my niche. Marketing was my talent and I really enjoyed it.

But no because I still worry about taking on new projects untill I get into them and as another boss said I am a confidence player I need positive people around me who give me the confidence that I am doing a good job.

Which made me think about the comment this weekend from my Facebook friend. As some of you may know last week I spoke on marketing to a group of 60 plus businesses in Perth. I was very nervous and had quite a few moments of self-doubt before the event. However it went really well and the feedback I got from people listening was really great. People actually took notes on what I was saying I couldn’t belive it.

I have been reading in magazines recently of celebrities writing to their teenage selves and giving them some advice. I thought of turning this on its head and thought of what Fiona Ross would have thought struggling with maths, tearing her hair out at physics but with a dream that some day she would make something of her life. And I realised that Fiona Ross would be very proud of Fiona Drane and perhaps Fiona Drane should listen to her friend and not give herself such a hard time!

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About fionadranesblog

40 plus mum of two married with a mad cocker spaniel. Along with two colleagues run Bright Light Marketing a rural marketing agency who specialise in getting rural businesss noticed. www.brightlightmarketing.co.uk. Live in St Boswells in the wonderful Scottish Borders. Love books, walking and living life to the full here in the Scottish Borders though its sometimes a juggle!
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