The subject header here perhaps looks as if I am going to be deep and meaningful about world affairs confess I don’t feel equipped to do so.
Suffice to say that two things have made me write this blog entry though the worry about trying always to be perfect and failing has been with me for well probably for ever.
The two things that have prompted this are firstly the accommodation at the Delhi commonwealth games and two far nearer to home and far more precious in my world the rash that has developed all over my six-year-old son’s body. Seeing pictures of the accommodation in Delhi I know that I could not stay in that accommodation and that has made me reflect that as some of the commenters on the radio said that we in the West have very high ideals we are always seeking perfection in all that we do. Despite the fact that if the accommodation gets finished it will quite quickly lose its perfection even if it ever achieves it as we simply do not live in a perfect world. My son came into the world a perfect baby without a blemish. As he has grown he has got the bumps and bruises of any young child but still to me he is perfect he is my son and I love him very much. So the ugly blemish that currently covers his body I would rather have on my own body than his and I would love to be able to do anything to wave a wand and make it go away. We have been to the doctor and he assures me its an allergic reaction and will go away and I am trying to belive this but I want his skin to look its usual little boy look without ugly rash. And I know I am lucky apart from the rash he is not unwell.
But I know as I said at the beginning of the piece that contrasting him with material things there is no contest I would want both my children to be well above anything else. Yet I constantly aspire in my house that things will just be perfect. We live in a Victorian house which is a bit like the Forth Road bridge once you have completed one task another one needs done. As my husband will tell me I am a person who creates clutter but who believes she is a minimalist! It is never going to happen neither am I ever going to live in the perfect house. Carpets even new ones get stains, glasses break, cushions tear and so forth. I look at TV series like Sex and the City and think wish I had a house like Carrie Bradshaw’s.
But? Is that a realistic world? Does it exist and if it does are people happy in that existence? Having watched a lot of programmes about India during the Channel 4 Indian series the thing that struck me was not the poverty but the fact that within what we would view as slums they had homes, they were clean and each day they cooked fresh food with local ingredients and the sense of family and community is huge. I remarked at the time and will remark here that the UK coud learn a lot from their culture as there is a lot we could learn from those values.
I can’t do anything about the building of the accommodation, neither can I wave that magic wand and get rid of my son’s rash. And yes I will get frustrated the next time the pup brings mud into the house and another part of the carpet gets stained. But perhaps when I do I should remember just how much I do have in my life and take a leaf out of some of these people in India who I saw back in January on TV. It’s what you do with what you have got and it’s what you value in life. If that’s material goods they are always going to let you down. If its your family, community and your surroundings and creating memories for them you may be on more solid foundations. Lesson to self Fiona Drane less trying to achieve perfection and more appreciation for what you have.